Mistranslation

At the hotel you can find a breakfast room and a coffee shop apart from the 100 - 120 person brassiere which offers Hungarian specialities and international cuisine for the guests and customers from the city.

In an East African newspaper:
A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.

In a Vienna hotel:
In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.

A sign posted in Germany’s Black Forest:
It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.

In a Zurich hotel:
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

A translated sentence from a Russian chess book:
A lot of water has been passed under the bridge since this variation has been played

In a Rome laundry:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency:
Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages.

Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand:
Would you like to ride on your own ass?

In the window of a Swedish furrier:
Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin.

On the box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.

In a Bangkok temple:
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.

In a Tokyo bar:
Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

Tokyo hotel:
It is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notice.

Another Tokyo hotel:
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

In a Copenhagen airline ticket office:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.

On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.

In a Norwegian cocktail lounge:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

At a Budapest zoo:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

In the office of a Roman doctor:
Specialist in women and other diseases.

In an Acapulco hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

Bucharest:
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time, we regret that you will be unbearable.

Austria:
Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.

Hong-Kong tailor shop:
Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

Bangkok dry cleaner:
Drop your trousers here for best results.

Rhodes tailor shop:
Order your summer suit. Because is big rush, we will execute customers in strict rotation.

Portuguese patent agent:
‘It will not be necessary to state the name and address of the inventor if the applicant is not himself.’

On a menu of a Polish hotel:
Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beer soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people’s fashion.

A Hungarian mistranslation in a customs list:
Sporting firearms with ammunition = sportoló tűzoltók ellátmánnyal (athletic firemen with supplies)

Don’t get it? Errr…then. Houston, we got a problem.